Bad Days

What do you do on bad days? I don’t mean disappointing days, I mean days where the floods are raging and they won’t stop, and you have a tale left to tell. Where do you find the strength to get up and go one more round? Last night, I flopped into my bed and prayed “Dear God, I’m all tapped out. I’ve got nothing left in the tank, and I have to get up and give it one more go tomorrow.” Well, first off, I want this to be a testament to the fact that I understand what that’s like. I am often known as mr. “suck it up.” Believe me, I’ve been to the point of exhaustion. 

First off, you won’t get anywhere trying to make the bad feelings go away. When you’re crushed, it’s too much of a burden to resist the feeling. Let it stay. Not every moment was meant to be a good one. The same God that made the sunshine made the rain. There is redemption to be had in those awful moments, but it’s not quite what you think. 

When I picture dark times, I picture seeds planting. When the ground beneath us feels like it’s being pulled out from under us, it’s like God is pulling back the soil to plant something new. Sometimes He wants to rip out a weed that has been choking the veins of your heart, keeping you from living the life He wants for you. Sometimes he wants to plant something new. Inspiration always hits the hardest when you need it the most. Whatever picks you up when you are in that dark place truly sticks to you. I would almost say it becomes you.

“A friend loves at all times, And a brother is born for adversity.” Says proverbs 17:17. 

Born for adversity. 

Born to bond over the hard times. Born to be there when things go south. 

Have you ever had a fair weather friend? Someone who is fun to be around, maybe even says they’ll be there when the going gets tough, but when the going really does get tough, they’re the first to get going? Somehow, adversity is ingrained in our DNA. We scorn the fair weather friend without anyone needing to tell us to. Then we prioritize the one who was actually there when we needed them most. 

But this doesn’t just apply to people. The seeds of values are often planted when times get tough. Can I tell you one of my own seed-planting stories? In the middle of college, my life hit an all-time low. I was fighting some of my own demons, losing friendships and clinging to my girlfriend as many college kids do. Then, one day, she dumped me. I was devastated. I lost almost everyone and everything. Those were some dark days. Things didn’t immediately bounce back. I didn’t immediately fall into a better situation, and it didn’t feel like life got any happier. I spent two years in that pit, but I learned a valuable lesson while there: even if you aren’t getting results, keep marching in the direction you want to go. Eventually things will figure themselves out. I found relief in at least trying to change my fate. The desperation also gave me a hunger, and I channeled that hunger into my study of philosophy, which has shaped who I am today. 

It’s natural to want to avoid bad feelings or make them go away. We feel like nothing has changed if we don’t feel different. I’m no exception. I’ve had a frantic week trying to not feel the stress. But there’s a peace in accepting that the same God that made the day made the night. Night still sucks, but even the night can be used for something. The bad times, the chaos, the soul-crushing moments you want nothing more than to erase, God uses those too. So next time you’re in the middle of a crappy day, just ask yourself “what seeds are being planted through this?” Run towards the things you want planted deeper in your heart, and get hungry for a craving worth satisfying. I pray I’ve enriched your life in some way. 

Till next we meet

May peace be with you.