#11 Do it Wrong

Here’s a trick to help you overcome perfectionism: do something wrong on purpose. Intentionally tell the story with jumbled-up details, play a song you don’t know yet. Take some time to burn the voice of the tyrant in your head who demands that everything be done exactly the right way. Take a day and sprinkle in the occasional mistake and don’t go back on them. If you make it to the other side of this experiment, I think you’ll find some interesting results. 

First of all, doing this exercise will begin to break down the throne of your oppressor. The voice of perfectionism will slowly begin to lose its hold. Make no mistake: this probably won’t happen all at once. It may take repeating yourself many times to prove to your captor that you aren’t backing down. But in due time, you will break the bars of your cell and begin to live anew. 

And here’s the other thing: perfectionism won’t go down without a fight. He will lash back, and what he winds up telling you will be crucial to bringing him to rest for good. At its heart, perfectionism has valuable things to say. The problem is simply the way he says them and the lengths he goes to so he can get his way. Perfectionism is a powerful tool, but it must be wielded, not yielded to. 

It’s good to take some time to write down the thoughts that come to mind when you begin to deny perfectionism. When you say “no” to correcting that smudge on your vest, or retake that picture that could have been focused better, what thoughts go through your mind? You will learn a lot of things about yourself and where your perfectionism comes from if you take this exercise to heart and really do it well. Who knows, you may make some incredible breakthrough in the healing of your spirit if you simply begin to refuse the chains that bind you. 

And once you have gotten used to denying perfectionism, the next step is to bring it back into good balance. Practice walking the tightrope of holding yourself to high standards without using those standards to crush you. I think the ultimate balance is insightful perfectionism. Keep some of those wildly high expectations, then examine your thoughts as you stumble. What thoughts came up as you tripped this time? What sparked your downfall today? Ultimately, those ideals may never be anything more than dreams, but what are dreams but the direction we are inspired to run in? Sometimes the thing we need most is the light in the distance for us to map a path towards. The problems arise when we beat ourselves up for not being there. Instead, we need to fixate on the beauty of the ideal we are striving for, rather than the imperfection that we still have. If we focus on how much we like what we are after, and how much of it we have already, then we will be able to run our race well. 

At the end of the day, that’s all we need: a thing to healthily fall in love with. And that’s where I think God comes in. I have a deep desire to get it right on the first try. Or, at least to know I’m on the right track to getting it right. I’d rather plan things out ahead of time than fly by the seat of my pants. Lately I have been seeing how God has planned out the course of my life, guiding me through each step in its proper time. It may not be easy, but there’s a peace in knowing that someone has things under figured out. That someone knows what’s going on.

And it helps me follow His lead, knowing that someone has it all figured out in advance. Will I get it perfectly? No. But it’s like trying to learn to play an instrument. Without a teacher you might stumble on the right note every once in a while, but the best way to do it is to learn from someone who knows what they’re doing. And I’m pretty sure that the God of all knowledge and wisdom might have some sort of clue as to what needs to be done in my life. Ultimately, I know I can trust what He’s up to, even if I don’t see what’s unfolding. So I pray you find your way to silence perfectionism and to learn to grow in your maturity. I pray God finds you where you are and leads you to where He knows you ought to be. I pray for your wellbeing and your life as it is. May it grow into a beautiful and glorious creation

Until next time

May Peace be your Guide.