#7 Find Balance

An important thing to learn along your journey is how to find balance. I have always said that when everyone starts their journey of life, they don’t know much. As such, everyone’s confidence tilts to one of two sides. We either claim it in spades, or we abandon it entirely. I believe that the key to true balance is to figure out which way we lean and to push toward the opposite.

Most people, when they talk about balance, act like it’s a juggling of two opposing forces. The image that comes to mind is that of walking a tightrope while holding a pole in your arms. Although there might be some truth to that idea, we get much further on a different picture. I say instead of a tightrope, we should see the art of balancing ourselves as one of driving up or down a hill. When you are going up, you are pushing against gravity, which wants to send you down the hill. So you need to double your efforts in order to push against the natural way of doing things. When you are going down, you need to focus on hitting the brakes so you don’t go too fast. In both cases, you are trying to go somewhere in a balanced way, but the way you find that balance is different. In the same way, you need to learn the ways you normally do stuff, and then figure out if you need to focus your efforts more or to do a little less.

Sound confusing? Let me try an example. I tend to live the life of a canon. I can’t hit every target, but when I finally commit to one, I hit it with violent force. Translation: I undercommit then overdo it. When I hydrate, I drink a gallon a day. I refuse to get a new hobby until I find something that becomes the only thing people know me for. And over the years I have seen myself do this time and time again, to the point where I can see the signs when I start overcommitting. 

And, as such, I know when to punch the gas and when to pump the brakes. I know that I need to push a little harder to get something new started, and to ease up when I am fully committed. No matter how right it feels, saying no to the last three glasses of water usually saves me some stomach pain at the end of the day. 

And that’s the tricky part: doing it when your natural way feels right. It will take some brute force to get used to this new way of thinking, but believe me, you will see the difference in due time. You will have times where you see the difference after trying it just for the heck of it. It will eventually be a way of life that you get excited about. You will even wonder why you never did things this way before. 

I have come to recognize my impulses and when to control them. For example, tonight I started cooking and thought to myself “I want a simple, plain meal of eggs and rice.” And immediately, my brain started zipping around the cupboards. “Oh, we could add cheese! And onions! And maybe a little buffalo sauce!” I had to stop myself and shout “NO! Just a simple rice and eggs dish, tonight!”              

And it won’t always be wrong to follow your impulses. Sometimes you’ve got to let loose and give it your all. Sometimes you need to proceed with caution and reserve. The key is to be willing to act as you must, even when it isn’t what you prefer. Play around with it, eventually you will get the hang of it. And I believe that this is a huge step towards maturity. If you act the same way all of the time, it will lead to a lot of situations that could have been handled better. It may even get to the point, as it has so often with me, that you run into trouble because you only do things a certain way. Or you may get lucky and be just fine. But personality is like a sword. You should learn to wield it well, learning to meet every day with what is called for. Doesn’t that sound wise to you?

So I pray you take the time to learn about yourself, to master yourself. At the end of the day, only you can embark on this journey, and I pray you journey well. 

Until next time

May Peace be your Guide.