#10 Manage the Damage

I think I mentioned this in a previous series, but I think it’s crucial that we manage the damage we could bring about. If you don’t know how to operate a bulldozer, perhaps it’s better if you don’t just hop in and give it a go one day. If you don’t know how to weld, don’t just randomly pick up a flaming hot blowtorch! These ideas may seem obvious when I say it like that, but I think there are some borderline cases where it might be better if we learned how to ask for help first. 

And that’s a step I think we could all take. Sure, there are some scenarios where you aren’t really sure if things will go disastrously wrong, but those are more like exceptions, rather than rules. That’s something you could ask an expert about. Instead of “how do I do this? Or, could you just do it for me?” Ask them “how much trouble would I cause if I messed around with this?” Things might be quite alright, or things might get very bad very quickly.

For example, I know not to mess with my car. If I just drove it, I could hurt myself with hot liquids, there are lots of little parts that could break, and it would be very easy to cause permanent damage to myself or the car. There are knobs that could turn too tight, pieces that must go on just right and so on. I also know not to goof off at the top of a 40-foot ladder. I secure that sucker before I ever set foot on it. 

And I think that’s the question we need to ask as we enter our new jungles. When you want to learn something, or try something new, or make a decision that you aren’t 100% sure about, ask yourself: how far could the damage spread? If you aren’t sure, just double check with someone wiser than you (and, by the way, this is also a great way to spend some time with wiser people in general.) And if you can’t find anyone to coach you through a situation, maybe you’re in the wrong place to learn. 

You could do this at work when you need to make a judgment call. You could do this when you have to make a decision about your car. Whatever situation you are trying to grow in, you should ask for help if you aren’t sure. I know that asking for help can often be a difficult thing (especially around new people, or everywhere if you’re a guy. We hate that,) but the benefit of gaining the wisdom to be wise far outweighs the damage you could do if you try to do everything solo. It’s funny: sometimes, in our desire to be our very best, we hold ourselves back from the means to be just that. Basically, we shoot ourselves in the foot by trying to do it all solo. 

But this isn’t to say you want to go around looking for people to turn into your crutches. No, what I am saying is to find people to help you create playpens. Areas that are safe to mess around in and control the damage so that you don’t accidentally set off a nuke. One of my IT supervisors used to tell me “go mess around with things. Nine out of ten times, you can reverse the problem with the click of another button.” And that was how I learned about computers. I ripped them apart, slapped them back together, and maybe accidentally broke a few along the way. But I did it all with the assurance that the damage wasn’t anything that couldn’t be handled. And if it was, I tagged in backup, or didn’t mess with it at all. 

I pray you find those people to help you set up a playpen. And I pray you have the courage to reach out for the help that you need, and that you play in that pen as much as possible. Most of the experts that I have met have spent more than their fair share of time messing around in their craft. And although they have had some damage-control help, they still made their own mistakes. Yes, you want to minimize them, but don’t beat yourself up when the oopsies come. They come for us all from time to time, and when you’re new at something, it may feel like all the time. Just keep your head up and keep rolling!

Until next time

May Peace be your Guide.