#8 Villains

Today I was thinking about something. Oftentimes, we claim to be a whole bunch of things. We say we are strong, we say we are smart, and so on and so forth. But when we actually run into opposition, it becomes all too easy to say that we aren’t those things. It’s almost as if something being a challenge makes us believe less in ourselves. I think it’s high time we rewrote our understanding of ourselves and how we see our skill sets. 

I’m going to pull out my favorite example again: bench pressing a bus. Nobody can do it. Does that mean that nobody is strong? Do we go around beating ourselves up because our muscles can’t move a literal ton of steel? Absolutely not! Then why do we call ourselves dumb when we fail a math quiz, or say we are a bad driver when we hit a curb? 

Here’s my take: we all look to our circumstances for answers. It’s only natural, but I think it ought to be overwritten. What we should focus on is what we commit ourselves to. Instead of saying “man, this math is hard. I must suck at it,” we ought to say “yes, this math is a challenge. But I’m on my way to becoming a math-expert, so this is my challenge for today.” I think this goes for the future as well. Maybe you aren’t good at math. But if you are planning to commit to being a math-wizard, then you can see it as your first challenge instead of the wall that is going to stop you. 

I had this thought when I started going to the gym. At first, I could barely lift five pounds, and it would take me about five minutes to get tired. But I told myself that I was just going to start somewhere and get going. After a while, people started knowing me as the gym guy. It always inspires me as I tell them that I wasn’t always the guy that they see today. It didn’t just happen to me one day. I put in the work to get there. I think it’s easy to look at all the things we are naturally good at. Adults teach us to do that when we are kids. But instead, we should be focusing on where we want to be, and all the stubbornness that we are going to need to get there.

Batman struggles this in The Dark Knight rises. Joker is really the first villain that truly dedicated himself to taking down our dark hero. And although he rises to the challenge, it also makes him question his entire reason for being Batman. Basically, the first movie is him striking the face of evil, and the second movie is evil striking back. As Alfred so bluntly puts it. 

You spat in the face of Gotham’s worst criminals. Didn’t you think there would be some casualties?

Basically, he’s saying “come on! You didn’t think anyone would fight back?!? That there would be no repercussions to starting a fight?!” It’s easy to get caught up in success, but I think we should almost become just a little less dependent on it. We should learn to be what we are regardless of the outcome. We say that a lot in terms of the bad stuff, but I think it goes for the good stuff as well. We should be like machines, spitting out responses no matter what the circumstance.

But I’m not saying that we should be numb to it altogether. After all, that kind of takes the joy out of living, right? I’m just saying that we should be a little detached so that we can continue to act in a consistent way when things don’t go quite right. I think we should learn to be able to act consistently throughout the fight, disciplining ourselves to be able to do what we do, even when opposition comes knocking. 

Now you might be itching for some practical thoughts. How do we apply this to our own lives? Well, grab a piece of paper and draw a big box at the bottom of the page. Then, draw a line from the top of the page down to that box. In that box, write down the place that you want to be. Attach all the things that you are going to work at being good at to the line. Pin this piece of paper somewhere so that you see it regularly. Then, when things get hard, you can look back at it and say “yeah, things are getting hard. But I have earned the right to be confident about this aspect of myself, so that voice that’s bringing me down can go stuff it!” This even works for other areas that you aren’t working on, too. Maybe you are getting good at math, but you aren’t funny. You can look at the picture and say “maybe I’m funny sometimes, maybe I’m not. But I’m not a loser. I’m not completely worthless, and I’m not bad at everything. Just look at how far I have come with my math skills!” In a way, it puts that bad feeling in a box. Maybe it doesn’t go away in an instant, but at least you can keep it from spreading to places it ought not to. 

Here’s an example: I’m working to become a plumber. That’s my end goal. The thing that’s going in my box. Along the line, I am putting my ability to work hard physically, my tape-measuring skills, and my fraction skills. They’re all going places and when I feel like I am having a bad day, I am going to remember that I have been putting in work to get better at these things. That voice that’s calling me a loser can stuff it! 

So get to writing! Get confident in yourself and set some goals worth working on! I pray that you begin to see the disciplines you have committed to, and the ones that you ought to commit to. And I pray you have a blessed day!

Until Next Time

May Peace be your Guide.