Do Hard Things#2: the why

People often ask me why I take cold showers. Or, why I do uncomfortable things in general. Most people think it is because I am simply built differently. Maybe I am, but as I always tell people: if I am built differently, it’s because I built myself different. During one of my low points, I began to realize something: if you embrace discomfort, comfort will follow. If you chase discipline, peace will follow. The opposite is also true: if you chase comfort, you will suffer. If you seek pleasure, you will find pain. This is not to say you should only seek to be in pain, but if you focus on seeking out the unpleasant, good things will follow. Then, when the good arrives at your doorstep, you can go nuts like it’s time for Thanksgiving dinner!

That’s my “why” for doing hard things, but I have had to go through the refinement process to get there. For a while, it was insecurity. I wanted to prove I was someone worth something. As I liked to put it, I wanted to have my “superpower.” Everyone is known for something, and I wanted to be known as the guy who was tough as nails. I will say: desperation is a powerful fuel source, but it doesn’t turn off once it has been activated. It drives you to the point of exhaustion and then ushers you to keep pushing. Could this be seen as a good thing? Maybe once in a while, but in the long run, it’s not sustainable. I had to learn to control myself to boost my sense of self. 

Everybody has a “why” that drives them. I believe doing difficult things is an excellent way to see what yours is. It shows you what motivates you, what doesn’t, and what helps you tap into your full potential. Maybe you are driven to help others. Maybe you are driven by the thrill of achievement. Maybe you just want to do something with your life. It’s for you to figure out why you do what you do, but the longer you keep yourself under pressure, the deeper you will get to see into your mind. 

For me, my gauntlet is anything related to cold. For some reason, that is what has stuck with me. I feel like there is something poetic about the cold. I see it as the embodiment of discomfort and the mindset I mentioned above. I think latching on is a key component to the journey. I have found there is a feeling for “this challenge seems daunting, but I am so in!” There’s a feeling of fear, but a feeling of committing to fear. I think taking time to explore what challenges you feel drawn to will provide more interesting insights. 

I find that difficult challenges can be found anywhere if you are looking for them. They don’t all have to be daunting like cold showers or marathon running. It could be upping the stakes on something you already do regularly. If you play an instrument, commit to learning a new song every day. It could be trying to be able to do 100 pushups in one sitting. I don’t know what goals you want to set, but I want to encourage you to set the bar just high enough that you feel the small ping of the voice that says you just might fail. Not so much that it’s impossible, (unless that’s your aim, in which case, go for it!) but just enough that you can feel doubts creep in. 

I want to encourage you to consider taking up a challenge of some sort. Consider looking for something big that intimidates you. Seek out the giants in the deep, dark corners of your mind and develop a gameplan to slay them. There is no greater feeling than aiming high. Even if you don’t achieve, the growth you will have along the way will be life-changing. What better way to live than chasing something? I hope my words can encourage you to grow and develop yourself in a dramatic way!

Until next time

May peace be with you.