#7 Feeling Less Small

So yesterday we talked about how often the reason we feel small is because other people put us there. But not everyone will be trying to make you feel that way. You might have a really nice friend who happens to be good at everything, leaving you feeling just a little bit lackluster. You might know someone that is much older than you, making you think that you could never even dream of being like them. Or you might have someone who’s a jerk and likes making other people feel small. Whatever the case may be, they’re there and they’re bringing you down. What should you do when you reach this point?

Your first thought might be to get away from them. After all, if they’re a bad influence and you can’t change what they do, so what choice do you have? Although I do think there’s a time and a place to run away, I don’t think you can just take off and expect everything to be alright. You see, you can get away from people physically, but they will wind up living on in your head if you aren’t careful. That feeling of helplessness can turn into a pattern if you don’t resolve it. So it’s important to leave running as a last resort. 

So the only option is to confront. But we aren’t going to start running around, fist-fighting everyone we meet. That would be a little absurd, no? No, that would be completely absurd! So how, then, do we reach a place where people don’t bother us nearly as much as they used to? How do we develop that thick skin that so many say we need? How do we really go about freeing ourselves from the destructive clutches of our evil tyrants? 

I think the key is a little trick that I talked about back in a post at the very beginning of this year called “dethroning the kings.” It’s a decent post, so I recommend you go check it out. The gist of it is this: pick out one flaw in every person you meet. Keep it at just one, but make sure you point out something legitimately wrong with every person that starts to make you feel small. This will keep your brain from feeling like they are completely above you and make you feel like you are made of the same stuff they are. That they are the same type of being that you are: human. Sure, they might know more in a certain area or be better at a certain thing, but at the end of the day, they are made of the same type of stuff as you. At the very core, you’re a person and they’re a person. They make mistakes and you make mistakes. They’re not any bigger than you are, or visa-versa. 

But you should still follow your leaders and those who are authorities over you for the most part. Maybe the trick is believing that you could, under the right circumstances, walk in their shoes. If you went through the right steps, you could do what they do. Try to imagine yourself successfully being where they are. Picture yourself succeeding in the life that they are living now. Imagine that you could actually make it as them if you had the right opportunities. That will level the playing field and give you a chance to see that you are important too. 

But sometimes, you just get someone that’s a real jerk. Maybe they have issues. Maybe they were raised badly. Whatever the case, they aren’t your problem. After you have made yourself feel a little bigger, freeing yourself from feeling small, only then can you flee the scene. What I want for you is to be able to walk away with peace. I know I have had hard times that I didn’t resolve when I ran, and they changed things in my head for a while. So face those people who are living in your head. Tell them they can’t live there and drive them out. Then at the end of the day, you can rest your head peacefully, knowing that you are somebody special with something to give the world. 

I know this may sound simple, but be patient if it doesn’t fix things overnight. Changing how you think can take time. Just stick with it. One day you will wake up and realize that you are a completely different person because you refused to be intimidated by anyone. I pray that the rubble is cleared from your mind so that you can get in touch with the worth God has given you.

Until next time

May Peace be your Guide.