#4 Pain and Timers

It’s crucial to keep the ending in mind when you go through pain. And I’m talking about so much more than a simple “this too shall pass,” though sometimes does the job. As much as possible, we have to remind ourselves of the boundaries of hardship. Tough times have a way of feeling realer, longer, and more permanent than anything else in our lives. Sometimes we even manage to start thinking about brighter days, only to reply with “yeah, but I’m just rising to suffer again.” What do we do when we can’t seem to see the end of our pain? 

This is one of those times where I am grateful for God’s hope. This year has been a non-stop ride. I feel like Frodo Baggins from Lord of the Rings: the least adventurous hobbit of them all, facing threat after threat with the hope of one day returning to his precious shire. Like Frodo, I miss my shire. I miss having normal weeks, a rhythm, a routine. Life is constantly changing, and trouble keeps knocking at my door. It’s tiring. But I have hope that God is letting all of this happen for a reason. I like to imagine myself at 35, maybe 40. I see myself looking back at these moments and thinking “I am glad that I went through those dark days. They weren’t fun at the time, but I’m in a much better place because of them.” I often cling to the hope that things will one day make sense, and that I will have answers for why things turned out the way they did (who knows, maybe I’ll even share those reasons with you guys!) 

But I don’t feel settled leaving you with that type of answer. I do believe you should be praying, and following the path God wants to set you on, but I’d like to give you some concrete ways to play with the timer to help you endure life’s hardships. You need to mess around with the idea of when to remind yourself of the finish line. I’m reminded of all the times I have jumped on the treadmill. Even when I set it for just 25 minutes, they are an intense 25 minutes. When I’m all warmed up, and things start picking up speed, it doesn’t usually help me to remind myself that I still have a whole twenty minutes to go! That’s when I would do something similar to what I talked about yesterday, adapting to this speed as the new norm and getting comfortable with where I am in the process.

Then around the halfway mark, I’ll throw myself a little party. I’ll pat myself on the back because I have made it halfway. I just have to do that again and it’s over. From there, it’s game on: every minute is one step closer to my liberation, the end of my suffering! I might even count down to the cooldown if it’s that bad. Either way, the reminder that it’s almost over keeps me going. It keeps me motivated. It doesn’t make me give up, on the contrary! I push harder because I know the timeframe I have to pour all of my energy into, but not so much that I burn out early. And when I finally reach that sweet, sweet victory, I can rejoice because I have successfully endured the pain, and have become stronger for it. 

Is your life like this? Do you have something tough you need to make it through? Maybe you need to set yourself a little milestone to look forward to. Schedule a day off, or a whole vacation if you can! Maybe, like me, you need to set your imaginary arrival point, picturing the day that you make it out of this struggle. And if your hands are tied, you may need to accept that this is the new pace. Let go of the struggle to hold onto more than you can. Maybe you need to find new ways to hold onto those things. Whether you accept the pace or fix your eyes on the day when things will get better, know that you have ways to help you tough it out so you can be who you need to be. 

I pray for your struggle. Whatever you are going through, I’m praying for you. I pray that you are able to use these little tricks to give yourself a little extra oomph when you need it. Doing this won’t make your life a cake walk, but it will make it survivable. Whether you believe it right now or not, I know that you’ve got this! You’re stronger than you think and more durable than you know. Take heart and run your race with pride. I’m rooting for you!

Until next time

May Peace be your guide